I swear, i have never missed anyone this much in my whole life. =( but, i know its for my own good. and, it has helped a little.. no more long phone calls, no more long hour meet-ups, no more fights, no more distractions. exactly what i aimed for.
but, why do i still feel like crap? isnt this supposed to help me?
haizz..
as days pass, we are growing further and further apart..
i know she doesnt ask for much. (just friends)
but, its too difficult for me.
everytime i see her, i think of what we had, and what we can have..
its a damn bloody sucky feeling lah..
and, she actually still said before we parted that i can still hold her hand..
haha.. and, how is that not supposed to let me raise my hopes?
haizz.. there's just so much for me to say.. but, there's just nobody i can really speak to about this.. i guess i'll just have to swallow all this on my own..
well, at least i know she has someone who really cares for her standing by her side now.. (probably even loves her)
upsettingly glad.
p.s, the little toungue at the back of my throat, (my uvula) swelled up to twice its size today. and, im still fasting although it hurts like f*ck. didnt even bother to see the doctor. haha.. on a normal day, i would use this as an excuse to take m.c haha..